Where’s my healing?

“That’s great that it happened for them — but what about me? Where’s my healing?”

I know I’ve thought that a few times. I’ve had a hard time with feeling anxious ever since I was in primary school (25+ years). I remember a specific time when I was at a friend’s house when I was in grade two and I felt so anxious that I needed to make up an excuse to go home right away. I remember when I turned thirteen and the anxious feelings climaxed. Then they climaxed again a few years ago and I’m still working to learn to cope/recover from getting so worked up about everything.

I’ve heard stories of people saying they’ve felt bad anxiety and used to have panic attacks, but then they were prayed for and were instantly delivered – and then I wonder why that hasn’t happened for me. Why did I have to live the last 25 years learning to cope with feeling anxious?

I mean, instantaneous healing is a thing. We see this time and time again in the Bible, a prime example being found in Luke 5: 24-25 where Jesus healed a paralyzed man:

Then Jesus turned to the paralyzed man and said, “Stand up, pick up your mat, and go home!” And immediately, as everyone watched, the man jumped up, picked up his mat, and went home praising God.

But I guess, sometimes, I forget that instantaneous healing isn’t the only type of healing – even though it seems to be the type of healing most people hope for…and it seems to be the case in all the Bible stories that stand out in our heads.

But let us not forget about the accounts of the gradual healings — the ones that happened in stages. How about John 9:6-8, which says:

Then He (Jesus) spit on the ground, made mud with the saliva, and spread the mud over the blind man’s eyes. He told him, “Go wash yourself in the pool of Siloam” (Siloam means “sent”). So the man went and washed and came back seeing!

Why would Jesus do that when He could have just spoke the word and the man could have been healed? Perhaps it has something to do with building the man’s faith. But I’m sure the obedience and effort on the man’s part was well worth it to him once he was healed.

Which brings me to a third type of healing… a prophetic healing. A healing that is a ways down the road. A healing that will take time – but you can have hope in the midst of the waiting because The Lord will encourage you along the way.

Remember Ezekiel chapter 37 about the dry bones? God told Ezekiel to speak a prophetic word to the dry bones; that He would put flesh and muscles on them again. Then Ezekiel spoke those words from the Lord and the bones came together and formed bodies. Then the Lord told him to call the winds to breathe life into the bodies. So again, Ezekiel spoke the word, the winds came, the bodies were filled with breath and came to life. Then God said this:

“Son of man, these bones represent the people of Israel. They are saying, ‘We have become old, dry bones – all hope is gone. Our nation is finished.’ Therefore, prophesy to them and say, ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord says: O my people, I will open your graves of exile and cause you to rise again. Then I will bring you back to the land of Israel. When this happens, O my people, you will know that I am the Lord. I will put my Spirit in you, and you will live again and return home to your own land. Then you will know that I, the Lord, have spoken, and I have done what I said. Yes, the Lord has spoken!”

What’s your grave of exile?

Anxious feelings?

Depression?

Sickness?

Broken hearted?

Addiction?

Lonely?

Abuse?

Your hope IS NOT all gone.

Be encouraged, dear friends, that just because you haven’t been instantaneously healed doesn’t mean your healing isn’t on the way. In Mark 1:  40-41, a man with leprosy said to Jesus, “If you are willing, you can heal me and make me clean.” Don’t miss what it says next: Moved with compassion, Jesus reached out and touched him. “I am willing,” He said. “Be healed!”

I haven’t been instantaneously healed. I’d say I’m in the gradual healing…or maybe even the prophetic healing stage. Yes, I still struggle with feeling anxious regularly. Yes, I feel like it limits my quality of life at times. There were things I used to love to do when I was younger that, as of late, make me feel really nervous. But you know what? Recently, I’ve been able to start doing some of those things again. Gradual healing. I’ve learned a lot and become stronger through the process. Don’t miss out on your healing process because you don’t know it’s happening. Also important – don’t talk yourself out of your healing. Don’t take possession of those things that can cripple you. Be very careful of what you speak over yourself, because the tongue can bring life or death.

So whatever it is you’re struggling with, believe that Jesus is saying “I am willing, be healed!” to you. Your healing just might not look exactly how you thought it would. Stay hopeful; keep believing.

And if you think stories about spitting in the mud to heal someone’s vision or bringing dry bones back to life is wild…well, wouldn’t you like to think that a God that creative just might want to do something that creative in you?

Laura


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